“I have applied all this to Apollos and myself for your benefit, brothers and sisters, so that you may learn through us the meaning of the saying, ‘Nothing beyond what is written’” (1 Cor 4:6 NRSV).
Many Christians are confused about sexuality in the bible and this is, in part, due to wrong teaching going back to the Church Fathers, especially Augustine and Jerome; and also because the New Testament itself is unclear in some passages. There are obvious sins about which there is no doubt, such as fornication, adultery, incest, prostitution, and sexual worship, but others seem only to infer that a particular sexual act is sin.
In the early Church there was a growing but unhealthy and unbiblical emphasis on virginity and celibacy which was based on a passage in Paul’s letter to the Corinthians: “This I say by way of concession, not of command. I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has a particular gift from God, one having one kind and another a different kind. To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is well for them to remain unmarried as I am” (1 Cor 7:7-8 NRSV). Here Paul gives practical instructions for sexual relationships; but he also says that celibacy and virginity are preferable. However, he does not mandate celibacy or even marriage – far from it – he recognises that the sexual drive is strong and needs to be expressed regularly and frequently within the context of marriage in order to avoid sexual temptation: “Do not deprive one another except perhaps by agreement for a set time, to devote yourselves to prayer, and then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control” (1 Cor 7:5 NRSV).
Early Church and Victorian sexuality
But the early Church put such an emphasis and value on virginity and celibacy that it was all but mandated; indeed, Pope Gregory 7th did mandate celibacy for Catholic priests, and this rigorous and unhealthy practice is still enforced today, and has been the cause of centuries of sexual abuse resulting in broken lives and suicide of its victims. Communities of celibates withdrew from the world and temptation, searching for peace and purity in monasteries and convents throughout Christendom, both East and West. And married believers, from all levels of society, who were prevented from becoming monks and nuns because they were married, took vows of celibacy within the marriage, living together and abstaining from sexual relations.
This unhealthy and unrealistic view of sex became even more pronounced in Victorian society, where even a woman’s leg or ankle being visible was scandalous and sex was a taboo subject of conversation. This didn’t stop the rampant fornication in society, it just sent it underground, and men’s clubs had all sorts of depraved and criminal vice going on behind closed doors.
However, in the 1960’s, people finally began to rebel against the repression of healthy discussion and practice of sex; but sadly, the swing was so extreme that sex was reduced to animal function, and chastity was despised and virginity mocked.
What did Jesus mean when he expanded the meaning of adultery?
And now Christians are confused, torn between a prohibitive Victorian attitude of sex and desire for sexual freedom. And Jesus’ expansion of the 7th Commandment, to include lustful thoughts and desires, has been insufficiently translated; with the result being that men are afraid to look at a woman for fear that they’ll be guilty of heart adultery. And if they’re caught looking at a woman for whatever reason, they’re made to feel dirty and sleazy. Feminists and Marxists are actively trying to emasculate men and turn them into insipid creatures which have lost their identity; and their wives are often on board with this. Instead of their masculinity being accepted and appreciated, men are being shamed for it. This attitude towards masculinity has been permeating the pulpit for some time, and Christian men are urged to find their “feminine side” by allowing themselves to become vulnerable and to express their emotions openly.
Modern bible translations of Matthew 5:27-28
Thank God for some of the modern bibles which clarify the meaning of this passage. The KJV translation of this passage is; “Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart”. This is usually understood to mean that when a man looks at a woman and has any kind of sexual thought or response, even a glimmer, he has committed adultery in his heart and is therefore condemned.
But how can a man not be aroused to respond in this way when God created him to be like it? This response of a man being sexually aroused or feeling the slightest sexual awareness at the sight of a woman who has caught his attention is an intrinsic characteristic which God designed and built into him; it’s in the architecture; it’s what makes him male. The Psalmist wrote: “I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made” (Ps 139:14). A man responds to a woman in this way because he can’t help it. I don’t say this because men are weak and are led by their lusts – far from it! And I’m not making excuses for so-called “poor, weak, men” who have no self-control. Men are not weak in this respect and don’t need excuses to defend their behaviour. Most Christian men are honourable and well-meaning and want to please God in every aspect of their lives; and they want to honour and respect women. And neither does God need us to make excuses for his “faulty” design. “…ascribe ye greatness unto our God….his work is perfect…” (Deut 32:3-4). “And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, it was very good” (Gen 1:31).
So what did Jesus mean when he said “whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart”?
The modern bible versions bring the meaning out and make clear what Jesus meant. For example:
- …everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart (ESV).
- …anyone who looks at a woman and wants to possess her is guilty of committing adultery with her in his heart (GNB).
- …if you look at another woman and want her, you are already unfaithful in your thoughts (CEV).
- …everyone who [so much as] looks at a woman with evil desire for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart (Amp 1987 ed).
- …if anyone looks at a woman and wants to sin sexually with her, in his mind he has already done that sin with the woman (NCV).
These versions make it clear that a man simply looking at a woman and getting any kind of sexual response at the sight or sound or scent of her is not who Jesus was referring to when he expanded the meaning of the 7th Commandment; he was talking about intent. When a man sees or thinks of or is communicating with a particular woman and determines to seduce her or desires to have sex with her, he has already committed adultery with her in his heart. These are two different and separate responses in a man’s heart concerning a woman; and it is eminently possible to “appreciate” the woman in his mind, even if he sees or attempts to see her female “attributes” without committing adultery in his heart. Heart adultery is about intent; just seeing or looking at a woman without the intent to “possess” her is not sinful. It’s fun, it’s pleasant for him, but he hasn’t sinned. Isn’t this characteristic what drew him to the woman he wanted to marry when he first saw her? Didn’t her femininity attract his attention, making him want to get to know her? No doubt he looked forward to the time when they would marry and he would then be able to have sex with her; but, being the noble man that he is, he refrained from having sex with her until it could be done lawfully and without sin.
But when a man does get sexually aroused by a woman, perhaps seeing her as he’s minding his own business but as she passes by and he notices her figure in tight clothes, or peeks down her blouse, or sees a sexy scene in a movies, or whatever, and he consequently gets so turned on by it that he wants to express that arousal sexually, he doesn’t intend to have sex with the woman he sees, he waits until he can do it with his wife. This is what God intends for him and for his wife: “But because of cases of sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. The husband should give to his wife what is due her and likewise the wife to her husband. For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; likewise, the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another except perhaps by agreement for a set time, to devote yourselves to prayer, and then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control” (1 Cor 7:2-5 NRSV). Alternatively, he can masturbate.
The difference makes ALL the difference
Whereas the sins enumerated in Leviticus ch 18 and 20 each have a serious (even death) penalty attached to them, the masturbation in Leviticus 15:16, 18 only require the actor to ritually cleanse himself and remain separate from the community until evening, at which time he can resume his normal activities. The good news is that Jesus died to fulfil the ceremonial laws, so now masturbation doesn’t even require a ritual washing.
An example for our learning
King David is an example of the lustful intent which Jesus referred to in Matt 5:28. He was on his rooftop when he saw a beautiful woman, naked, and bathing. He was electrified by what he saw and he allowed his passion, his lust, to dominate him. He immediately had her brought to him and had sex with her. David sinned, committing adultery in his mind first, and then actively. He had dozens of wives in the harem and could have sent his courtiers to bring one of them to him; he had no need to sin with the beautiful Bathsheba. But he wanted to possess her – he wanted only her. Any other woman, in David’s present state of mind, would not do. His desire for her immediately became intent, and he summoned her to him without delay.
We can’t condemn David for being bowled over at the unexpected sight of this beautiful naked woman in her bath – it was a natural response and was not sinful. It was only when the arousal became intent that David committed adultery. If he had called one (or more) of his wives so that he could satisfy the sexual urges raging in his loins, there would have been no sin committed, and history would be quite different. Or if he had preferred to masturbate there on the spot as soon as he laid eyes on Bathsheba, watching her as he did so, there would have been no sin.
This is a good example for Christian men (and women) to follow today. Examples such as these were written “for our learning” (Rom 15:4), as Paul tells us. In David we can see what to do and what not to do; we have his example to enable us to understand what Jesus was talking about when he expanded the application of the 7th Commandment.
Masturbation is not a sin
As for masturbation, this too is regarded by most Christians today as being sinful. But how can it be a sin when God hasn’t stated that? How can God, who is justice itself, condemn us for something he has never told us is sinful? In Leviticus chapters 18 and 20, he tells us what the sexual sins are, conveniently brought together in one place, so that we can know what he doesn’t want us to do. And masturbation is conspicuous by its absence in these lists. However, God does indicate in another place that masturbation is not inherently sinful: “If a man has an emission of semen, he shall bathe his whole body in water, and be unclean until the evening” (Lev 15:16 NRSV). The word “masturbation” is not used here, so this gives it a wider application than just masturbation; the emission of semen could result from a wet dream (Deut 23:10-11), or marital sex. But so that we don’t restrict it to the act of sex in marriage, he tells us: “If a man lies with a woman and has an emission of semen, both of them shall bathe in water, and be unclean until the evening” (Lev 15:18 NRSV).
So Christian men can take comfort that when they “appreciate” a woman but have no intention to seduce her or wish they could, they have not sinned. If they get aroused to the point of wanting to physically express that urgent sexual desire, they can have sex with their wife, and they have not sinned; neither have they “used” their wife, because God says that the wife does not have exclusive rights over her body, nor the husband have exclusive rights over his, so that they may each assist the other when they are tempted. This is God’s design and his plan for men. Or they can masturbate, which is God’s allowance for them.